~Audi alteram partem~

You know your part of the story. Now hear the other side.
Cos everyone just want to be heard

The joy of a child

There's one story in 'Friends' the TV series, where Phoebe and Rachel went jogging together. Rachel later finds out that Phoebe has a weird way of running. And when I say weird, it's WEIRD, with hands all over the place and legs going apart from each other.
When confronted about this, Phoebe says she just run the way she did as a child, careless and free.

Kinda true at some point.
As we grow older, what we care is how people will see us, what people might think, what people might say. But we're missing the point.
For example, when SOME girls are going swimming, what they think about is, which bikini they should wear, what color, what model, are they slim enough, do they push the bikini pad enough, how should they tie their hair. In the end they didn't swim at all, but merely sitting around at the beach or at the side of the pool -to show off their bods, bikini and hair (or maybe that's their purpose from the beginning).

I have a little sister who's only 3 years and a half now. Whenever we say we're going to the beach, she'll jump to the door and ready to go. Sometimes, she doesn't even give a damn if she hasn't wiped her mouth from her lunch spread.
She doesn't jump to the front of the mirror, or to her closet to pick the best swimming suit or beach wear. Because children still stick to the real meaning of things: if we go to the swimming pool, we swim. If we go to the beach, we swim, we play with sand, we get dirty (not that kind of dirty, pervs out there).

So, moral of the story today: don't fret over what people want to say. As long as your conscience is clear, just do whatever you need to do. Don't be fake. And don't lose meaning of things. Do your things because you like to, because you're enjoying yourself. Not because it's the hip/cool/popular thing to do.

Btw, in the end, Rachel follow Phoebe's running style ;)

Tying the knot is suffocating

SotD: Underappreciated by Christina Aguilera.

Actually, I want this title to be the title of the book that I will write in the future. But 'future' is a a faraway place.
So here, I'll give you, few lucky people, a sneak peek to my future book.

When I was younger (well, I'm still young *ahem*), I made a promise to myself that I won't get married. I told that to a few close friends who quickly exclaimed "WHY NOT?!" As usual, secret spreads fast. So soon enough, most of my classmates knew about it (can't help it, I was so popular *cough*). And they all exclaimed "WHY NOT?!" Usually, I would answer, 'why should I?' But they wouldn't take that for an answer. That's how the idea of writing the book come about.

I started to list to myself all the reasons why I don't want to get married. I surprised myself: there are so many reasons. As this is a sneak peek, I'll only tell you one of the reasons (anyway, it'd be too long if I tell you everything and you won't read till the end): I don't believe in marriage.
Come on, who are we kidding? Why do people these days get married? Ask that to Westerners, they'd say, "cos we love each other". What's love? They'll stare at you blankly.
Ask that to Asians, they'd say, "cos we have to, if not, the family line won't go on". Now I'm the one who stare at them blankly.

Marriage should be a commitment. But what a does commitment mean when they can break it by divorce? It's only make the commitment more expensive. And worse when they already have kid(s). They stay together because they have to, not because they want to. It's a thing I hate to do, those must-do things. Well, when the arranged marriages were a trend, the couple had to stay together. But then, they accept it and they learn to love each other. Or at least, they learn to accept each other.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this because I keep meeting horrible guys. I have one faboulous boyfriend, one wise god-brother or two, and a couple of great guy friends. But still, I don't believe in marriage. If we can keep our love strong for a lifetime, we don't need a label titled 'marriage' to stick us together.

If you still don't understand the whole thing I'm saying, this reason is described just right by 'Underappreciated', a song by Christina Aguilera (oh Christina.. still my hero). Old song, but in a way reminds me (still) why i don't want to get married.
Oh, the reason is also pictured nicely by the movie '500 Days of Summer', from Summer's perspective.

"Eagles fly alone." -AtG
"Don't talk to PR persons, they are paid to tell you a version of truth."
-Dr. Stephen McIlwaine.

John 4

Always feel so depressed lately. I don't know why. Just feel like I lose the will to live (not like it's something new). Everything's dark, everything's annoying. Everything's wrong. If I have just one wish, I wish I were never born. Let the traces of me be erased from the history of the world.

Oh, wanna talk about something that IS new: Finally, after devil-knows-how-many-weeks since the last time I did, I went to church yesterday (no, Felix, not your kind of church).
The church sucked as usual, the people were fake as usual. But there's something soothing: the sermon is about John 4:1-26. John has always been one of my favorite books in the Bible (yes, even a devil like me do read Bible sometimes). John is always different from Matthew, Mark or Luke in telling about Jesus. And this particular passage, tells about 'Jesus and the Woman of Samaria'.
I've read the passage so many times before, heard it preached in the church so many times before. But never did I realize what it means. It doesn't only show that Jesus have no problem mingling with other races or sinners, or both, but He also have no problem in mingling with women.

Sounds simple?
Not for me. Like I said, for me, it's something very soothing. Jesus isn't sexist. Jesus doesn't think that men are higher than women. Jesus doesn't think that women are lower than men. He practiced what He preached: everyone's equal.
I'm not talking about religion, I'm not talking about God. I'm not the person who has rights to talk about such things. I merely talk about a great historical figure, a brilliant philosopher, who wants us to see what true morality is.
This further reminds me the many things I've believed long time ago and have forgotten now. Somebody out there love you, not matter you want to believe it or not. Even if everyone left, you'll have One Person that will always stay. Treat everyone else the way you want to be treated.


Random lovely quotes about love, from all around. No copyrigh infringement intended, just helping to spread the love.

I don't care about your imperfections that's what makes me adore you.

You had me from the day you smiled.

I don't like missing you. But I love having you to miss.

Let's kiss in the rain… Where the rain is so hard that the only thing we can see is each other.

So what if I think too much or if I over analyze things. So what if I can't eat or sleep… At least you'll know why. You're always on my mind.

He means the world to her and she doesn't even know it.

Sometimes one smile means more then a dozen roses.

I have more feelings for you, than any other girl ever will.

It's all just magic when I think about you. And when I'm not with you, I go crazy.

If a guy really likes you he'll listen to what you have to say and not what he hears from others.

You know you're in love when you see that someone and your heart flutters, your stomach gets butterflies, and the rest of the world disappears

We're all a little weird. And life's a little weird. And when we find someone
whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up in mutual weirdness and call it love.

It's completely impossible to find a guy who won't ever hurt you, so go for the guy who will
make the pain worthwhile.

Let's set the record straight. No one makes me smile quite like you do
Sometimes, the answer we've been looking for is right around the corner.
Sometimes, we're just delaying to make the turn.
"To become truly great, one has to stand with people.
Not above them."
-Charles de Montesquieu.

A call to arms..

Soundtrack of the day: A Call to Arms by 30 Seconds to Mars

This is a call to arms, gather soldiers
Time to go to war
This is a battle song, brothers and sisters
Time to go to war

For one, I've finally decided which song from 30 Seconds to Mars is my first favorite. Despite of everything that I've said about their new album, 30 Seconds to Mars is still inspiring for me. I guess that's what it is with good stuffs, you have to savour them first to be able to truly enjoy them ;)

Did you ever believe?
Were you ever a dreamer?
Ever imagine heart open and free?
Did you ever deny? Were you ever a traitor?
Ever in love with your bloodless business?

Yup, inspiring me. In this dull life, in an even duller world. With the dullest people. Don't get me wrong, I have few great friends, the wisest people you'll ever meet. But compare to others that surrounding me, they are so few and so far.

I've always been a depressed girl by nature. But lately, it's all coming back to me. Like reading too much Ecclesiastes. Feel sick of everything. Where's the promise of "your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly"^? It doesn't exist. Just a well-worn dream.

You do this, do that, this, that, this, back again. Like a cassette being played once too often. Thinking those things will make life easier, yourself likable, your dreams one step closer. But nuh-uh. You only one step closer to the end of your life, or the end of the world, or whichever is closer.
And, bad news, things will only get worse the further you go from the time you were born.

Ever want to be free?
Do you even remember?
Want to be God, the Devil like me?
Ever want to just stop? Do you want to surrender?
Or fight for victory?

Good questions. Everyone wants to be free. But few remember.
Look around. No need to be too far. Look at the mirror. Do you feel bitter inside? Lonely? Unloved? Why?
I know few of my friends that have blogs. Most of the content of their blogs are about disappointment, bitterness, anger, hatred. Why?
Because few remember. Of their dreams. Of their purposes in life. Of their motivation. Of the answer of what should they fight for.
But how should we remember, when this life force us to only remember about one thing: MONEY? Gosh, I can go on and on about that.

Darkness falls, but here comes the rain
To wash away the past and the names
Darkness falls, here comes the rain
To end it all, the blood and the game

But everything has an end, right? Based on some beliefs, the world will come to an end. The old will pass, the new comes. Tears, pain, sadness will be wiped away.
Well, bad news again, though, it's only for few chosen ones.

Far, far away in a land that time can't change
Long, long ago in a place of hearts and gold
Far, far away in a land that time can't change
Long, long ago in a place of hearts and gold

Lesson to learn (for myself too): keep fighting. The battle isn't over yet.
If you think you're at the bottom of the pit, take heart, because when you're at the bottom of the pit, there's only one way left to go: UP.

This is a call to arms... brothers and sisters